The Game.. and how women can win.
Found this post on a blog written by a man, and his
perspective was illuminating and snapped me out of some delusions. After
a little editing, my hope is that sharing this can challenge our
reasoning as women, define that grey area in our interactions with men
and empower us to speak up and stop getting the run around. At the end
you might find you already knew some of this but the question is, do you
have the wisdom and courage to follow through? The post was originally titled ‘Reasons Why Your Relationship Is a Lie’ and if that breaks your heart a little, that’s the beginning of breakthrough LOL. Be brave and enjoy!
It’s okay to grow apart, but it’s not okay if you won’t admit that it’s happened. There are so many fake, half-hearted, holding on for what relationships that it’s hard to tell who’s in love and who’s in denial. While there are few men who are genuinely tentative, relationship indecision is mostly a female problem. Mature men are never confused about what they want. A man who wants a woman will always say, “I’m in. No other guy better even think about even adding her on Facebook!” That’s the passion and hunger that’s reserved for the women we are impressed with and need on our team, and it’s called making a female our girlfriend. Men will also pursue another type of girl, but not on that level where they want to lay real claim, so they pull her in then push her away with fake indecision. Men call these girls, sleep with these girls, and chill with these girls, but it’s all done on such a basic and minimal level that anybody objectively looking from the outside in can see the con. However, there are women so in love with the idea of finding love that they take these scraps of a fake relationship and make a meal out of it. This man doesn’t really claim you, he doesn’t really spend time with you, he doesn’t really care if somebody else were to sleep with you… but he puts in just enough work to make you think he does. All the fellas reading this know that with most girls you no longer have to commit fully, you just do enough to keep her hoping, and once she has hope, you can pillage her like a Mongolian village.
Every February I find it funny that so many women are quick to make side chick jokes, when in reality they’re not even sure of their own relationship status. Most of you aren’t side chicks to men who have main chicks; you’re side chicks to a man that can’t even get a main chick. You’re clinging to a dude that’s in love with someone he hasn’t even met yet. The idea of meeting a girl tomorrow that’s better than you is more powerful than the idea of being with you and that’s why he’s not fully committing! You’re a seat-filler for someone who doesn’t even want that seat, how pathetic is that? Girls see side chick jokes as hysterical when they’re single, because being lonely is better than sharing a man with the world. However, when you’re in a relationship that’s rocky, those jokes only get a slight chuckle because you know damn well you didn’t get anything for Christmas and now you’re waiting to see if you’ll get any attention on Valentine's Day. Culturally it’s ‘funniest’ in the black community because black women have gone through or know someone going through struggle relationships where it’s clear that they are being lied to constantly. So the not-so-hilarious question is why do we have so many women able to relate to bad relationships that it can spawn an endless amount of “b**** be like” and “niggas be like” anecdotes that ring true?
It all starts with the good intent of prevention: looking out for things so you won’t become just another victim of lies. Women like specific examples of things to watch out for, things that scream that he’s cheating, that she’s a side chick, or that he’s just not really interested in her on that real love level. They want black and white behaviour that gives them a black and white answer, but we live in a world that’s all shades of grey. Knowing your relationship status doesn’t boil down to a series of basic tests that he passes or fails, it requires independent thought void of the fantasy thinking that dictates that if a man says he loves you, it means he loves you. Refusing to read between the lines is a kind of vigilance that will get you deceived. To be told you’re different usually means you’re the same. If someone is telling you how much they miss you, yet they don’t take an hour out of the twenty-four we have in a day and spend it with you, it’s hollow. It’s the 21st century and you’re still accepting words as proof of feelings? Do you know how many times I told my wife she wasn’t like other girls? None, because I didn’t need to gas her, I put my last name where hers used to be to prove it. Regardless of how complicated you want to pretend that your relationship is, it boils down to one thing: If a man wants a woman, he snatches that woman up. You know how someone who wants you treats you, regardless of the ups and downs, his desire to be with you and to make it work is constant and out in the open. ‘Um, maybe, I don’t know, let’s take time and figure it out’—those are things we say to throw confusion, and men will more readily have you believe that you have trust issues and are paranoid, than admit that they don’t want to work hard enough to create security. Let your nose be sharp enough to sniff out that subtle BS.
Your conscience always know the difference between what’s real and what’s not, yet your ego and your need to be loved keep your blinders up. You’re like a 6th grader whose friend tells him wrestling is fake. You rush home, put on your favourite match, and say, “well that part was fake, but that part was real,” because you aren’t ready to admit that you were suckered. 9 out of 10 relationships are faker than a John Cena haymaker, but you ladies refuse to see it. If you love living in a fantasy, then embrace that messed up relationship. Just don’t keep lying to the world like you don’t know the real story. I always hear “What’s his problem?” “Why does he act as if he doesn’t care?” “What are we really?” Here are the answers: His problem is that he likes sleeping with you, not really talking to you. He acts as if he doesn’t care because he truly doesn’t, he just wants you to shut up, and be there when he calls for you. His problem is that he’s frustrated that he can’t get the girl he really wants to be with because that fly one isn’t thinking about him. What you are is something to scratch his itch, whether it’s physical and/or emotional, it’s not a relationship until he commits. When it’s physical, this is the reasoning: He has man parts, you have women parts, therefore he needs to lie and lead you on so he can get that in the most efficient and cheapest fashion. These days some don’t even have the cheek to lie, they will instead convince you it’s a mutually beneficial deal, till you find yourself asking that fateful question: “Where’s this going?” This is always the funniest question because it’s obviously going the same place it’s gone– nowhere. He will come up with excuses but it is what it is. Sex, arguing, making you act crazy when you don’t get your way, make-up sex, coming back after a few weeks sex, that routine is way more fun than Nintendo DS for guys. The messed up thing is that dudes are so good at pushing your buttons that instead of saying, “Wow, this guy really has no respect for me and doesn’t actually want to be with me,” you Ms. Basic have learned to love the abuse. These bums aren’t disrespecting you, they’re performing foreplay with your brain, and it turns you on and has you begging for more, all the while pretending, “I can’t take this anymore, things have to change,” Ha!
Let’s recap, you know he’s useless but you love the way he makes a fool out of you. You say you’re confused about what to do, but you know exactly what to do. Your relationship is more scripted than a Basketball Wives LA friendship, but you pretend you don’t see him reading off the same script as every other bum dude in the world. Love is so hard. Men are so manipulative. You can’t trust anybody. Wah Wah Wah. Love isn’t hard if you use your brain, and stop thinking someone’s automatically going to be honest with you because you’re you. You have to set the standard, stick to it yourself and hold them up to it. The average man wants to have sex with pretty women, okay looking women, even ugly women. Men want to play games and get a rise out of those same women. Men even want to stick around and keep having their way with those women because the fearless, confident women out here who know their worth refuse to submit to them like the love-sick weak women will. ‘Men shouldn’t lie to get what they want’—no, you shouldn’t lie to yourself and pretend that he’s not lying in the first place! If a guy sees that you fall for those ‘come over & chill’ , ‘I really like you ma’ ass-kissing, and Let me just taste it, beautiful hustles, then you’re not special, you’re just like every other woman he’s been with. If this has been you thus far: don’t use your common sense. Use this common sense:
If He Doesn’t Take You Anywhere, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Where have you been lately? I’m not talking grabbing a bite to eat up at the local strip mall, what places that you don’t want to go to does he drag you to? What places that he doesn’t want to go to do you drag him to? Relationships are about venturing out, not staying in. If the last time you’ve stepping outside of each other’s comfort zone was the first month, then you’re losing the battle because he’s not feeling engaged with you. When you love a person, it doesn’t matter if you’ve got half a tank of gas and ten dollars in your pocket, you go out and explore the world together. Don’t be sitting up on the bed making small talk between sex sessions and think you’re getting to know each other.
If He Doesn’t Buy You Anything, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Oh, so this dude was too busy to randomly buy you a Starbucks mug as a surprise because you always talk about drinking coffee in the morning yet he somehow finds money to pop Ciroc every weekend and save up for the new FIFA. Men who are in love aren’t insensitive, we’re like Al Bundy, we talk nonsense, but at the end of the episode, we do something nice for the woman we’ve been complaining about. You can’t force a guy to treat you, but that doesn’t mean you keep forcing it with a guy that treats you like s***. It’s not the price of a gift, it’s the effort, and there is no reason to wake up on Valentine’s Day, Christmas, or your birthday to only a text message from someone you give so much to. Women have been reduced to paying to spend time with a man that's supposedly so into them but will come up with every legitimate excuse not to treat them like a gentleman. If you let them, such men will have you have you catering to all their desires and their bills while making minimal effort to see that you are taken care of. Ladies, don’t let your pride and ego fool you into believing you should be going Dutch with these guys. You live in a man’s world where they don’t want to give you equal pay, talk about your stupidity behind closed doors, and brainwash you into a stay in the kitchen mindset, but as soon as it’s time to show you a good time, men want to remind you that you’re an independent woman and should split the price of that Wolf of Wall Street ticket and buy your own popcorn. How is this acceptable?
If He Doesn’t Let You Be Yourself, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Married couples bicker a lot, not because they’re annoyed with one another, but because they aren’t afraid to challenge each other. Fake couples or people in new relationships just be smiling, laughing, and it’s all roses. ‘Babe be tripping, Babe so crazy, Bae and me best friends.’ No, you are so sprung and don’t want to rock the boat so you let Bae say whatever while you cheerlead. I’ve realised that a lot of women, dumb themselves down, put on the “let’s just trip and be best friends” hat and can’t really be themselves around the men they like. If you’re afraid to challenge your man’s viewpoints or he doesn’t feel a need to even talk to you about real issues, then how are you really getting to know one another? He means so much and you’re so afraid to lose him that you bite your tongue, and nod your head, because you’re afraid “Massa” doesn’t like smart slaves. And you wonder why dudes only think you’re recyclable. I don’t care how much fun you have, if you’re constantly putting on fronts that’s not being in a relationship, that’s being a groupie.
If You Keep Having “The Talk,” Your Relationship Is A Lie…
How many talks can you have? How many times can you threaten to break up or break up and get back together? The Talk has become talks. You’ve been together for a year, yet you’ve had more serious talks than The Simpsons have seasons. The problem is that females love to threaten but they hate to follow through. The moment a woman gives a man enough rope to hang himself, she rushes to untie him like, “breathe baby, don’t leave me!” You want him to change his ways, you point out things you feel he should work on, and things that you will work on. If he doesn’t want to do these things, you will have to end it for good. So he agrees, sleeps with you after that talk, buys you a balloon, and makes breakfast that week. Two weeks later that dude is back to normal. Why didn’t your talk stick? Because you don’t have any power, weakling! He knows that you aren’t strong enough to break up for real, that you don’t know how to date new men, and he’s going to remind you of all your shortcomings to prove that no other man wants you but him… and this is the man you’re fighting to keep? Be strong enough to walk away. Single and secure is the best you that you can be.
If He Doesn’t Put Any Effort Forth, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Women are hard workers. I’m not just talking about those who put themselves through school, juggle careers with kids, etc… the hardest workers are the ones that want a man so bad that she burdens herself with making it work, while this dude kicks his feet up like, “I don’t care, it’s whatever.” There are girls in the hood who never even had a job, but they will wake up early and go to sleep late, trying to get Sean and her relationship back where it needs. There are women who are self-made business owners, who are messing up at work because they’re stressed over how to get Trevor and her relationship back where it was. Love is supposed to be a two way street, but these guys will close down their lane, and then wait for you to do all the driving. You ask about his life and what’s going on in his head… this guy just tells you ‘it’s chilled’. You ask what you can do to bring the romance back…. this guy tells you he’s going to be out late with his friends and not to wait up. You ask if he wants to go on a trip for his birthday… this guy has already booked his flight to Miami, one ticket. Not once does this man ask about your life, what’s going on in your head, if you’re happy, where you want to go, how you feel or even thank you for being so concerned with his state of mind. This is what I’m talking about, refusing to see the writing on the wall, because you want love so bad. If a man isn’t putting in real effort, that doesn’t mean he’s overly spoiled or has a one-track mind, it means he doesn’t care about you, and this is a relationship of convenience. It may not be just about sex anymore or about getting things from you, but it’s grown into bad mothering. You allow him to run all over you, make a threat, he stops, then ten minutes later he’s back doing whatever he wants to do. You’re trying to raise a grown ass man and you’re failing!
Women work so hard to get a man on the same page as them that they forget that love is a team effort. It’s not all about what you aren’t doing or techniques you aren’t trying, it’s usually a case of trying to write a happy ending with a man who’s trying to jump to a new book. You can’t spoil a man into being
happy with you! You shouldn’t have to fuss and
fight with a grown man, your job isn’t to drop bread comes and keep
smacking your knee for him to follow you like a dog. You meet a
man halfway then wait for him to do the same, if he doesn’t do this,
walk away. How is this complicated? In a healthy relationship, a man
initiates and meets a woman halfway, not some of the way, not a few
steps- the rest of the remaining way. Stop dragging a man that’s
standing still and get the hint that he doesn’t want to go. Moral of the
story, if someone wants to play any games, refuse.
The ultimate goal is to inspire a new generation of women that want to change the world and don’t need light skin, ‘likes’ or a man on their arm to feel validated. This journey starts in your heart, and romance is just one aspect of that.
It’s okay to grow apart, but it’s not okay if you won’t admit that it’s happened. There are so many fake, half-hearted, holding on for what relationships that it’s hard to tell who’s in love and who’s in denial. While there are few men who are genuinely tentative, relationship indecision is mostly a female problem. Mature men are never confused about what they want. A man who wants a woman will always say, “I’m in. No other guy better even think about even adding her on Facebook!” That’s the passion and hunger that’s reserved for the women we are impressed with and need on our team, and it’s called making a female our girlfriend. Men will also pursue another type of girl, but not on that level where they want to lay real claim, so they pull her in then push her away with fake indecision. Men call these girls, sleep with these girls, and chill with these girls, but it’s all done on such a basic and minimal level that anybody objectively looking from the outside in can see the con. However, there are women so in love with the idea of finding love that they take these scraps of a fake relationship and make a meal out of it. This man doesn’t really claim you, he doesn’t really spend time with you, he doesn’t really care if somebody else were to sleep with you… but he puts in just enough work to make you think he does. All the fellas reading this know that with most girls you no longer have to commit fully, you just do enough to keep her hoping, and once she has hope, you can pillage her like a Mongolian village.
Every February I find it funny that so many women are quick to make side chick jokes, when in reality they’re not even sure of their own relationship status. Most of you aren’t side chicks to men who have main chicks; you’re side chicks to a man that can’t even get a main chick. You’re clinging to a dude that’s in love with someone he hasn’t even met yet. The idea of meeting a girl tomorrow that’s better than you is more powerful than the idea of being with you and that’s why he’s not fully committing! You’re a seat-filler for someone who doesn’t even want that seat, how pathetic is that? Girls see side chick jokes as hysterical when they’re single, because being lonely is better than sharing a man with the world. However, when you’re in a relationship that’s rocky, those jokes only get a slight chuckle because you know damn well you didn’t get anything for Christmas and now you’re waiting to see if you’ll get any attention on Valentine's Day. Culturally it’s ‘funniest’ in the black community because black women have gone through or know someone going through struggle relationships where it’s clear that they are being lied to constantly. So the not-so-hilarious question is why do we have so many women able to relate to bad relationships that it can spawn an endless amount of “b**** be like” and “niggas be like” anecdotes that ring true?
It all starts with the good intent of prevention: looking out for things so you won’t become just another victim of lies. Women like specific examples of things to watch out for, things that scream that he’s cheating, that she’s a side chick, or that he’s just not really interested in her on that real love level. They want black and white behaviour that gives them a black and white answer, but we live in a world that’s all shades of grey. Knowing your relationship status doesn’t boil down to a series of basic tests that he passes or fails, it requires independent thought void of the fantasy thinking that dictates that if a man says he loves you, it means he loves you. Refusing to read between the lines is a kind of vigilance that will get you deceived. To be told you’re different usually means you’re the same. If someone is telling you how much they miss you, yet they don’t take an hour out of the twenty-four we have in a day and spend it with you, it’s hollow. It’s the 21st century and you’re still accepting words as proof of feelings? Do you know how many times I told my wife she wasn’t like other girls? None, because I didn’t need to gas her, I put my last name where hers used to be to prove it. Regardless of how complicated you want to pretend that your relationship is, it boils down to one thing: If a man wants a woman, he snatches that woman up. You know how someone who wants you treats you, regardless of the ups and downs, his desire to be with you and to make it work is constant and out in the open. ‘Um, maybe, I don’t know, let’s take time and figure it out’—those are things we say to throw confusion, and men will more readily have you believe that you have trust issues and are paranoid, than admit that they don’t want to work hard enough to create security. Let your nose be sharp enough to sniff out that subtle BS.
Your conscience always know the difference between what’s real and what’s not, yet your ego and your need to be loved keep your blinders up. You’re like a 6th grader whose friend tells him wrestling is fake. You rush home, put on your favourite match, and say, “well that part was fake, but that part was real,” because you aren’t ready to admit that you were suckered. 9 out of 10 relationships are faker than a John Cena haymaker, but you ladies refuse to see it. If you love living in a fantasy, then embrace that messed up relationship. Just don’t keep lying to the world like you don’t know the real story. I always hear “What’s his problem?” “Why does he act as if he doesn’t care?” “What are we really?” Here are the answers: His problem is that he likes sleeping with you, not really talking to you. He acts as if he doesn’t care because he truly doesn’t, he just wants you to shut up, and be there when he calls for you. His problem is that he’s frustrated that he can’t get the girl he really wants to be with because that fly one isn’t thinking about him. What you are is something to scratch his itch, whether it’s physical and/or emotional, it’s not a relationship until he commits. When it’s physical, this is the reasoning: He has man parts, you have women parts, therefore he needs to lie and lead you on so he can get that in the most efficient and cheapest fashion. These days some don’t even have the cheek to lie, they will instead convince you it’s a mutually beneficial deal, till you find yourself asking that fateful question: “Where’s this going?” This is always the funniest question because it’s obviously going the same place it’s gone– nowhere. He will come up with excuses but it is what it is. Sex, arguing, making you act crazy when you don’t get your way, make-up sex, coming back after a few weeks sex, that routine is way more fun than Nintendo DS for guys. The messed up thing is that dudes are so good at pushing your buttons that instead of saying, “Wow, this guy really has no respect for me and doesn’t actually want to be with me,” you Ms. Basic have learned to love the abuse. These bums aren’t disrespecting you, they’re performing foreplay with your brain, and it turns you on and has you begging for more, all the while pretending, “I can’t take this anymore, things have to change,” Ha!
Let’s recap, you know he’s useless but you love the way he makes a fool out of you. You say you’re confused about what to do, but you know exactly what to do. Your relationship is more scripted than a Basketball Wives LA friendship, but you pretend you don’t see him reading off the same script as every other bum dude in the world. Love is so hard. Men are so manipulative. You can’t trust anybody. Wah Wah Wah. Love isn’t hard if you use your brain, and stop thinking someone’s automatically going to be honest with you because you’re you. You have to set the standard, stick to it yourself and hold them up to it. The average man wants to have sex with pretty women, okay looking women, even ugly women. Men want to play games and get a rise out of those same women. Men even want to stick around and keep having their way with those women because the fearless, confident women out here who know their worth refuse to submit to them like the love-sick weak women will. ‘Men shouldn’t lie to get what they want’—no, you shouldn’t lie to yourself and pretend that he’s not lying in the first place! If a guy sees that you fall for those ‘come over & chill’ , ‘I really like you ma’ ass-kissing, and Let me just taste it, beautiful hustles, then you’re not special, you’re just like every other woman he’s been with. If this has been you thus far: don’t use your common sense. Use this common sense:
If He Doesn’t Take You Anywhere, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Where have you been lately? I’m not talking grabbing a bite to eat up at the local strip mall, what places that you don’t want to go to does he drag you to? What places that he doesn’t want to go to do you drag him to? Relationships are about venturing out, not staying in. If the last time you’ve stepping outside of each other’s comfort zone was the first month, then you’re losing the battle because he’s not feeling engaged with you. When you love a person, it doesn’t matter if you’ve got half a tank of gas and ten dollars in your pocket, you go out and explore the world together. Don’t be sitting up on the bed making small talk between sex sessions and think you’re getting to know each other.
If He Doesn’t Buy You Anything, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Oh, so this dude was too busy to randomly buy you a Starbucks mug as a surprise because you always talk about drinking coffee in the morning yet he somehow finds money to pop Ciroc every weekend and save up for the new FIFA. Men who are in love aren’t insensitive, we’re like Al Bundy, we talk nonsense, but at the end of the episode, we do something nice for the woman we’ve been complaining about. You can’t force a guy to treat you, but that doesn’t mean you keep forcing it with a guy that treats you like s***. It’s not the price of a gift, it’s the effort, and there is no reason to wake up on Valentine’s Day, Christmas, or your birthday to only a text message from someone you give so much to. Women have been reduced to paying to spend time with a man that's supposedly so into them but will come up with every legitimate excuse not to treat them like a gentleman. If you let them, such men will have you have you catering to all their desires and their bills while making minimal effort to see that you are taken care of. Ladies, don’t let your pride and ego fool you into believing you should be going Dutch with these guys. You live in a man’s world where they don’t want to give you equal pay, talk about your stupidity behind closed doors, and brainwash you into a stay in the kitchen mindset, but as soon as it’s time to show you a good time, men want to remind you that you’re an independent woman and should split the price of that Wolf of Wall Street ticket and buy your own popcorn. How is this acceptable?
If He Doesn’t Let You Be Yourself, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Married couples bicker a lot, not because they’re annoyed with one another, but because they aren’t afraid to challenge each other. Fake couples or people in new relationships just be smiling, laughing, and it’s all roses. ‘Babe be tripping, Babe so crazy, Bae and me best friends.’ No, you are so sprung and don’t want to rock the boat so you let Bae say whatever while you cheerlead. I’ve realised that a lot of women, dumb themselves down, put on the “let’s just trip and be best friends” hat and can’t really be themselves around the men they like. If you’re afraid to challenge your man’s viewpoints or he doesn’t feel a need to even talk to you about real issues, then how are you really getting to know one another? He means so much and you’re so afraid to lose him that you bite your tongue, and nod your head, because you’re afraid “Massa” doesn’t like smart slaves. And you wonder why dudes only think you’re recyclable. I don’t care how much fun you have, if you’re constantly putting on fronts that’s not being in a relationship, that’s being a groupie.
If You Keep Having “The Talk,” Your Relationship Is A Lie…
How many talks can you have? How many times can you threaten to break up or break up and get back together? The Talk has become talks. You’ve been together for a year, yet you’ve had more serious talks than The Simpsons have seasons. The problem is that females love to threaten but they hate to follow through. The moment a woman gives a man enough rope to hang himself, she rushes to untie him like, “breathe baby, don’t leave me!” You want him to change his ways, you point out things you feel he should work on, and things that you will work on. If he doesn’t want to do these things, you will have to end it for good. So he agrees, sleeps with you after that talk, buys you a balloon, and makes breakfast that week. Two weeks later that dude is back to normal. Why didn’t your talk stick? Because you don’t have any power, weakling! He knows that you aren’t strong enough to break up for real, that you don’t know how to date new men, and he’s going to remind you of all your shortcomings to prove that no other man wants you but him… and this is the man you’re fighting to keep? Be strong enough to walk away. Single and secure is the best you that you can be.
If He Doesn’t Put Any Effort Forth, Your Relationship Is A Lie…
Women are hard workers. I’m not just talking about those who put themselves through school, juggle careers with kids, etc… the hardest workers are the ones that want a man so bad that she burdens herself with making it work, while this dude kicks his feet up like, “I don’t care, it’s whatever.” There are girls in the hood who never even had a job, but they will wake up early and go to sleep late, trying to get Sean and her relationship back where it needs. There are women who are self-made business owners, who are messing up at work because they’re stressed over how to get Trevor and her relationship back where it was. Love is supposed to be a two way street, but these guys will close down their lane, and then wait for you to do all the driving. You ask about his life and what’s going on in his head… this guy just tells you ‘it’s chilled’. You ask what you can do to bring the romance back…. this guy tells you he’s going to be out late with his friends and not to wait up. You ask if he wants to go on a trip for his birthday… this guy has already booked his flight to Miami, one ticket. Not once does this man ask about your life, what’s going on in your head, if you’re happy, where you want to go, how you feel or even thank you for being so concerned with his state of mind. This is what I’m talking about, refusing to see the writing on the wall, because you want love so bad. If a man isn’t putting in real effort, that doesn’t mean he’s overly spoiled or has a one-track mind, it means he doesn’t care about you, and this is a relationship of convenience. It may not be just about sex anymore or about getting things from you, but it’s grown into bad mothering. You allow him to run all over you, make a threat, he stops, then ten minutes later he’s back doing whatever he wants to do. You’re trying to raise a grown ass man and you’re failing!
Women work so hard to get a man on the same page as them that they forget that love is a team effort. It’s not all about what you aren’t doing or techniques you aren’t trying, it’s usually a case of trying to write a happy ending with a man who’s trying to jump to a new book. You can’t spoil a man into being
The ultimate goal is to inspire a new generation of women that want to change the world and don’t need light skin, ‘likes’ or a man on their arm to feel validated. This journey starts in your heart, and romance is just one aspect of that.
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